"Practicing Survivor Self-Care", by STP Co-Director Leila Zaina

As survivors, we can be hard on ourselves. We can forget to take care of our well being. We can get caught up in all of life’s responsibilities, and make ourselves last on the list of priorities. Sometimes, we forget that we deserve care at all. But we do.

Caring for ourselves is the most important thing we can do during hard times. In fact, it’s the one thing that makes all of our life’s work sustainable. Self-care keeps burnout at bay. If we don’t take care of our most precious selves, our work, our families, and our communities can suffer greatly.

So, how do we begin to self-care? It can feel like an overwhelming project, but what’s important to remember is that it is a practice and it gets easier over time. Each day, doing a small piece of self-care can create massive shifts. You don’t have to have tons of time on your hands, or need lots of money to invest. Just an intention to care, and a few minutes a day. 

1. Breathe Deep.

Breathing is an act that we take for granted everyday. The simple act of intentional breathing throughout our day can decrease our stress levels and clear our minds. Taking a few minutes a day to sit in a comfy chair and breath deeply into your belly can help ground your energy and releases tension in the body. Your life and your breath matter.

2. Make Art.

Making art can be a transformative experience for survivors of sexual violence. Art can be a channel for healing. It can help speak to experiences that can’t be told with words. Move your body. Sing a tune. Dance to a rhythm. Shake it, jump, and grind! Paint your feelings. Perform on a stage, or for yourself in the mirror. Cook a nourishing meal. Bang a drum. Slam a message. Let your poetic voice free. Sometimes survivors do not believe that art is for them. Sometimes we feel shy making or appreciating art. But it is always ours to use, create, and play with however we like. 

3. Grieve.

Giving ourselves time to grieve the violence and pain we have endured is one of the most difficult, and crucial pieces of self-care. Grief looks different for everyone. Sometimes it looks like crying; wailing, tears that flow for days, weeks, or years. Sometimes it looks like silence; quiet reflection, inner dialogue and processing. Sometimes it looks loud; angry, aggressive, screaming, punching pillows, and taking kickboxing classes. Sometimes it looks like creating distance from family members or friends who don’t provide the kind of support we need. Sometimes it is all of these things at different times. Sometimes it is none. The key is to give yourself time to try different things that might help. Grief is an ongoing process. It can come and go in waves. But know that when we give it space to be, it won’t feel as overwhelming or out of control. 

4. Write.

Writing is a powerful healing tool to utilize when overcoming trauma. Keep a small notebook or journal and dedicate it to your healing and self-love. Write down all the things you love about yourself, things you are most proud of yourself for, or simply write about how your day went. Make lists of the things you need to do. Write down your worries, your thoughts, your feelings. Write letters to your childhood self. Write letters to your perpetrator (and never send them). Write about your trauma. Write a fictional story. Blog about yoursurvivor journey to help other survivors with shared identities. Whatever your desire or message, write it! 

5. Connect to Survivor Community.

You are not alone in your healing journey. It can be immensely helpful to connect with other survivors about their survivorship and to share resources. There is healing power in exchanging stories, and supporting one another in our paths to liberation. Attend a “Healing Through Creative Arts Workshop” for survivors at the Women’s Center in Cambridge, MA (February 18th workshop info below). Connect with friends who can support and love you in the ways that you need. Join a survivor support group in your area, over the phone, or on the internet. It is in community that we find the connection, relationship, and validation we seek. 

Self-care takes time and practice. It may not come easy at first. Each time you do a small act of self-care, congratulate yourself. It is a big step. Self-care is not meant to create extra stress; it is meant as a time to heal, to reflect, and to listen to our hearts so we may be ready to take on our lives with renewed energy. Record your efforts each day and be proud of your self-care. Caring for ourselves in a culture that invalidates and silences survivors is a powerful statement. And nothing short of revolutionary!

Written by Leila Zainab, Co-Director of the Survivor Theatre Project. Her favorite self-care practice is snuggling her cat, Lily. 

"STP's Collective Leadership Model" by STP Co-Director Leila Zainab

Survivor Theatre Project thrives on a Collective Leadership Model that guides the mission we hold, and the work that we do. Our Leadership Team is made up of previous Performance Project participants, facilitators, educators, artists, and activists who are deeply committed to our mission of ending sexual violence through performance and community dialogue. Each Leadership Team member plays a prominent role in the organization’s various projects, outreach efforts, and workshops. When we gather together in quarterly retreats, we cultivate strategies for community building, strengthening our connections, and creating new avenues for solidarity across movements.

Our staff serves alongside our Leadership Team. STP staff are focused on the general operations and management of Survivor Theatre Project. To STP, Collective Leadership means that everyone's voice is heard, and everyone's experience matters. In a world where leadership is often synonymous with corruption and hierarchy, Survivor Theatre Project leads with equity and a hive-mind approach. We practice transparency and authenticity with each other, and regarding our organizational decisions; always referring back to the Leadership Team for guidance and support.

Each of our roles is vital to the sustainability of our work. Each of our personal missions is important and we work to uplift one another in the process. We honor wellness and self-care, practicing our work of healing and self-love within our organization, as well as with the communities we serve. Our Collective Leadership Model means that we are committed to growing and learning new ways of creating community culture within our organization. It means that we are committed to creating a new world, a new way of working - one that is centered around honoring each and everyone one of us with care, love, and respect.

STP Healing Through Creative Arts @ the Cambridge Women's Center

For over four years, Survivor Theatre Project has run the Healing Through Creative Arts program at the Cambridge Women’s Center in Cambridge, MA. Program Coordinator Martha Rogers (STP Alum and Leadership Team member) shares with us the importance of this program in survivor’s lives and the vitality of the Women’s Center:  

Consistent steady programming for people who live with the unpredictable vulnerability of trauma is a critical piece in the healing process.  That steady year-in year-out presence is a major strength of the Healing Through Creative Arts workshop series. This series is a regular public statement that all child sexual abuse survivors in the Boston area have a healing, creative refuge for expression each month for anyone who walks through the door.

Martha continues

Another major strength of the workshop series is its grassroots base.  Many of the workshop facilitators were first workshop participants and had never led a workshop before.  Our facilitators choose to offer their facilitation because they know first hand that this environment can provide survivors a safe place to take risks, heal and explore different art forms.  The opportunity for contribution to others healing is healing in itself and empowering for each person whom I witness taking that leap.  It fills my heart. Repeatedly people who lead these workshops for the first time say that they want to do it again.  That speaks for itself.  And in some cases they go on to offer independent workshops as well.

This creative and healing space would not be possible without Program Coordinator Martha Rogers, the many facilitators who bring their skills and passions, the longstanding Cambridge Women’s Center staff,  volunteers and board members, the expertise and guidance of Incest Resources Director Elaine Westerlund, and the many survivors who bring spirit, courage and imagination to these workshops. We give thanks for this community, and send many blessings to you all in the new year.

"Survivors as Leaders in the Fight to End Sexual Violence" By Leila Zainab, Co-Director of Survivor Theatre Project

Being a sexual violence survivor is not synonymous with leadership. Often times, we view victims of violence as weak, wounded, broken, and traumatized. Survivors are forced to hide their histories of child sexual abuse, incest, or rape in their work places, dismissed to contend with their healing on their own time. Even when it is a prominent reason why one does the work that they do, they are forced to keep their identity under wraps for fear of making others uncomfortable, and being seen as unprofessional. Some survivors might even fear a negative backlash by their co-workers or superiors for coming out as a survivor, as it could be seen as detrimental to their work ethic or unbiased professionalism. Survivor identity is marginalized, taboo, and not a welcomed piece of anyone’s narrative in work spaces. Survivor Theatre Project does our best to uplift survivors in our organization, especially those that support and participate in our programs.

We have quite a few of these stories within Survivor Theatre Project. Kaia Jackson started off as a participant in the 2012 Performance Project, and is currently staffing Holyoke’s Performance Project as program assistant to co-facilitators Iréne Shaikly and Melissa Redwin. As a young professional in the field of performing arts and healing, Kaia is hungry for leadership opportunities.

“It is healing to be in survivor identified space, and it is rare! It is something I want to continue to support, advocate for, and work to create opportunities for others.”

Kaia studied at Hampshire College, with a concentration in theatre and identity studies. She was interested in learning about performance as a healing tool. Kaia developed her own piece entitled “Let the Body Speak,” a performance that invited people of all genders to speak to their own complex experiences of trauma with their body.

“As a survivor, it is scary to step into leadership. At STP, it is incredible not to feel alone in this work, that my skills are valued. Growing up, being a survivor felt like a weakness. Here, my survivor story is viewed as part of my strength.”

At Survivor Theatre Project, we believe that survivors have the power and capacity to lead the movement to end sexual violence, and to envision a path towards liberation.  We are committed to supporting survivors in taking on leadership roles because we believe that we are capable, strong, rational, and know first hand what survivors need. In doing so, we disrupt elitist models of professionalism, creating an organizational culture of trust, acceptance, community support, and healing for participants, volunteers, folks on our Leadership Team, and our staff. Together, we fight white supremacist patriarchal structures that attempt to hide and isolate us.  We are leading the way towards our collective freedom.

Meet Survivor Theatre Facilitator Iréne Shaikly

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